- Dakota got sick in a hurry, so fortunately it was Sunday night when it really hit him, and we were able to get him to the doctor and on antibiotics by Monday, so we got him fixed up quickly!
- Glorious Gal had pneumonia, so we took her in while our little guy was recovering from strep throat.
- A dear family member and very important person in my life landed herself in the hospital while visiting Glorious Gal in the hospital-not sure if she wants me to say much, so I haven't mentioned her name :)
- After everyone around me fell apart, it was my turn to get sick! A week later, I'm still murmuring and complaining, carrying on and whining, in hopes of getting better! It's a real good thing I'm hardly ever sick---women always say men are babies! Well, I must admit that when Dan is sick, he's usually really sick, and in bed most of the time. As for me, I need the sympathy of the world!!! My whole demeaner says, "Pity me! Pity me!!!" Even tho my own strep test was negative(getting my culture results Monday), I still need lots of sympathy!!!
So here you have it! My life in a nutshell!
I could:
- become a wildlife officer!!! Yes, believe me or not, I am 99.9% sure I saw a MINK run thru my yard this past week! I'm a city girl and will always be, even tho I live in the country, but I'm getting pretty good at figuring out what creatures are in my yard! I was very proud of myself when I saw a huge bird in the side yard, and researched online pics of hawks until I figured out what it was--a red shoulder hawk. My hubby is a falconer, so our family has become more familiar with birds. He's had 2 red tail hawks in the past----wanna see?
A few years ago when Amber did a double take out the bay window, we determined the huge black figure in the tree across the street and in the woods a little ways was a bear. It entertained us for about 45 minutes while it stayed up there eating apples. I've also identified other creatures in the yard-turkey, deer, mice, salamanders, snakes, woodchucks, and the occasional rare chocolate lab(more on him in a later post), so I'm a pretty good guesser! So maybe I'll call my local game commission's office to see if they might need help, if I'm out of a job!
I could also:
- Be the next great American chef! Just give me a $2 million dollar book contract, and I'll be on my way! Just call me the Leftover Queen! I has steak and a green pepper that needed cooked up, so I made spaghetti, poured Zesty Italian salad dressing over it, and added cooked steak and cooked peppers to the top of it. Restaurant quality, let me tell you! Thank you, thank you! It's just a gift! :)
- Be the newest and greatest weed-killer on the planet!!! I know this to be true because I am the MASTER at killing every plant that ever comes in my house! Which means, so sorry, Glorious Gal--the beautiful tulip plant you gave me is almost completely dead. :( Another gift of some sort(see how multi-talented I am? Why am I not in higher demand? It must be because I'm so modest and humble!) "Need something to take care of that pesky weed that's popping up all over your yard? No problem!!! Just dig them up and send them to Josanne--soon the little ghosts of crabgrass will be visiting your yard saying, "Lift your roots and RUN!!! RUN for your lives!!!"
- A doctor! As amazing as this may sound, I actually determined all on my own that I am SICK! Yes, I just looked at all the symptoms, put two and two together(when I wasn't busy whimpering and whining), and came up with the diagnosis. And just as amazing as that, I also determined that Dakota was sick. I know--I amaze myself too! And see, I already have a great bedside manner-lots of hugs and love to my patients, and pity too! I'm already cut out for the job if there is ever a shortage!
It's a good thing there doesn't appear to be a shortage in the above mentioned fields--I wouldn't trade my customers! And I'm not cut out for any of those jobs anyway, no matter HOW bad they WANT me!!! I'm terrified of bears, I'm so allergic to pollen that I can't stand in the driveway for an hour without being a stuffed up mess unless I'm well medicated, and I'm also terrified of needles!!!!
So send me sympathy, and pray for my recovery so I can get back to work! And please visit my blogs again. They'll be more active when the creativity juices overpower the "I'm sick(cough, cough, cough)!!! Achoo, SNIFFFFFFF......" stuff going on in my head!
2 comments:
Hilarious!
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